A Day of No's

I've read parenting articles on how we shouldn't say no to our children. That saying no over and over, actually causes them to ignore the word and they no longer obey it. (Of course, that would imply that at one time they actually did obey the word no, and we all know that's not the case) Instead of saying no, according to the experts, we need to find alternate ways to get our point across. Ideally, instead of using a negative word such as no, we should try and speak positively to our child. I'd love to know if the people who write these articles actually have children. And if they do have children, where on earth do they find the time that all this extra wording would take. If I added up how many times total I say no in a day, I'd be willing to bet the number would be close to 200. It takes me 1 second to say "no" and my children immediately get the point that I do not want them doing whatever it is. (Whether or not they follow through is another story.) If I were to follow the advice of these "parenting experts", it would take me at least 1 minute to figure out a "better" way to word things, and probably 45 seconds to convey the thought. So we're talking about a difference of 3 minutes and 20 seconds a day verses 5 hours 50 minutes! Where on earth am I supposed to find this kind of time???

So I decided to take a day, and keep track of every time I said 'no' to CamCam. Granted, some of these times I probably could have handled in a different/better manner, but I'm pretty sure that the majority of these times a quick response was necessary.

#1- 9:20AM: "No, no, no. Uggghhhh.....Ugggghhhh" Found him with a bottle full of milk that he had tipped upside down and shaken all over the room. Milk was all over the floor and all over the dining room carpet.
#2- 9:44AM: "No CamCam, get out of the baby's bed."
#3- 9:45AM: "No CamCam, that's not a toy." Turned around to see he had picked up my bra off the floor and was wrapping it around his neck and putting it over his head. Maybe he was trying to figure out how to put it on?
#4- 9:59AM: "No, you don't use your brother's toothbrush to brush your hair."
#5- 10:01AM: "No CamCam!" As he had a box of cheez-its upside down and was about to dump them out.
#6- 10:05AM: "Oh, no CamCam, you can't put cheez-its in there!" He had shoved cheez-its into the slots on the air conditioner.
#7- 10:10AM: "No, that's "Mr. Trouble's" food." Ate all his cheez-its, so he grabbed "Mr. Trouble's".
#8- 10:40AM: "No, sorry babe but you have to stay in your stroller." At the farmer's market.
#9- 10:45AM- "Awww, CamCam no...." After he pulled a $3 half-pint of cherry tomatoes off a table at the farmer's market and dumped them on the ground. Actually I felt pretty lucky I only had to pay for the 1, could have been the entire table.
#10 & 11- 10:50AM- "You want this toy? No? You want your blankie? No?" In the van as I'm buckling him up to leave the farmers market and he throws a fit.
#12- 10:53AM- "CamCam, no, don't take your shoes off please." Just as I park and am heading to get him out of the van so we can walk into a building.
#13- 10:57AM- "CamCam no! Stop!" At my parents office and he is letting water out of the water dispenser.
#14- 10:57AM- "I said no!" See #13
#15- 10:57AM- "Stop, Stop! No more water!" Ditto
#16- 10:58AM- "CamCam, no." Unraveling a roll of paper towels at office.
#17- 11:26AM- "No CamCam" Grabbed a yucky bottle out of my kitchen sink and was about to drink out of it.
#18- 11:40AM- "Ohhh no! Awww CamCam." Used his sandwich as a tissue and blew his nose on it.
#19- 11:47AM- "CamCam, no, get down." Climbing stool he pushed over to the kitchen sink.
#20- 11:54AM- "No, no, no. Ewwww gross." Shoving tissue he blew his nose on back into the tissue box.
#21- 12:10PM- "No CamCam, you're going to fall honey!" He's standing at the very edge of our stairs with his toes hanging over the top step and is edging himself more and more over the edge.
#22 &23- 12:38PM- At our preschool time: Him: "Ruff, Ruff!" Me: "No CamCam, what does a cow say?" Him: Pants like a dog Me: "No silly, moo moo. You know that!" Him: laughs and laughs
#24- 1:37PM- "No honey, I'm sorry it's ni-night time." Standing at the gate in his room, getting ready to climb over it.
#25- 2:22PM- Whispering: "No way, you're actually sleeping?"
***(Takes a LONG almost 3 hour nap, very unusual! Seriously lowers my amount of no's for the day)***
#26- 5:01PM- "Hey no, don't eat that!" He's with me outside and spots an old cheez-it on the driveway.
#27- 5:13PM- "No CamCam, out of the garbage please."
#28- 5:14PM- "Noooo CamCam!" He's wielding a pen!!!!
#29- 5:19PM- "No, give "Mr. Trouble" back his blankie." He's running around the kitchen island with "Mr. Trouble's" blankie and yelling: mine! mine! mine! "Mr. Trouble" is running behind him trying to catch up and crying.
#30- 5:33PM- "No? You want to stay in?" Said after he threw a fit when I took him out of his highchair. However, I took him out because he was reaching up to me and saying "out, out, out."
#31- 6:28PM- "No! CamCam get down!" On top of our eating bar area with a glass cup that he's just about ready to throw.
#32- 6:31PM- "What do you have now? Uhhh- no no no no no no." He has my digital camera and is having a blast opening up the part that protects the lens and sticking his little fingers in there.
#33- 6:34PM- "Nooooo..." Walking around with a bottle of wine he took off the wine rack.
#34- 6:45PM- "Hey! No phew phew's, no." He's sitting at the dining room table, holding one arm straight out, and the other arm bent over it so it looks like a gun and is making his gun noises as he shoots his dad and me.
#35- 7:07PM- "No, we do not play with mama's phone."
#36- 7:26PM- "No, don't go behind the grill. That's dangerous."
#37- 7:37PM- "No, just please don't touch." I'm trying to turn on his baby music for him and he's getting impatient waiting for the CD to load so he keeps pushing all the buttons making it so the CD won't load.
#38- 7:46PM- "CamCam no, don't touch." He's fighting with me to push the dvd buttons.
#39- 7:46PM- "CamCam no, don't kick the DVD player."
#40- 7:46PM- "No! Do not push your brother!" Why is it when kids get mad because we won't let them do something, they take it out on a sibling by hurting them? Or is it just my kids that do this?
#41- 7:47PM- "CamCam, no stop touching it" I'm now switching out our old DVD player with our new one because the old one wouldn't work, and he's trying to "help" me by plugging in everything he sees into any hole he can find.
#42- 8:34PM- "No, this is not play time, it's ni-night time. Please get into your bed."
#43- 8:51PM- "No, no, no, it's time for bed. Get out." Find him and his brother under his brother's bed playing.